I have surgery this morning on my middle ear at 7:15am. It’s called a stapedectomy to remove the tiny bones, called stapes, and replace them with implants to hopefully improve my hearing. I’m anxious, nervous, and all the other ouses that are involved when undergoing something that could have an unlikely outcome I don’t desire, like death.

I’ve been anxious for weeks about this, which is making me turn inward and feel antisocial. I’ve been keeping my head down and focusing on getting stuff done on the house since I won’t even be able to lift a gallon of milk, let alone clean up dead tree branches all over my yard for the next several weeks of recovery.

I’m sure I’ll be fine. It’s just the fear of the unknown. Will this surgery even work? Will I suffer any side effects? Will my hearing even improve? I be in the 1% that ends up with worse hearing? Will I be stuck with huge medical bills? Will I have to stayover night? Will they, Michael Jackson, me (give me too much anesthesia)? Will my wife end up a widow way too soon? God, I hope not.

But this isn’t my first rodeo. I’ve been put under a number of times for different procedures in the past. I just never feel at ease until it’s over, and I wake up. I’m going to turn 44 in less than a month and have far more I want to do before it’s my time for eternal sleep.

Today marks a month since leaving social media, and I truly feel it was for the best. I look forward to many more months of freedom from the social shackles and being productive. Hopefully, I will heal quickly and can keep up the momentum I’ve gained since my escape from Mark Zuckerberg’s human trafficking ring.

I am hopeful and excited about the future. Here’s hoping my hearing improves, and I can get back to full-fledged living soon.

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