It’s been 9 days since my surgery, and needless to say, there have been some ups and downs. Today was my first post-op follow-up with the surgeon, and things are going well and look good. Well, at least what the doctor tells me.
I wouldn’t know for sure since I’ve never had this surgery before, and to me, the dramatic roller-coaster of emotions, sensations, and experiences tell a different story. I was anxiously awaiting this day to finally take the packing out of my ear canal. Which ended pretty anticlimactic compared to what I anticipated and was hoping for.
I’ve been over here for the past nine days suffering through wild fluctuations in hearing. Where one minute, everything sounds super muffled and hard to comprehend, like everything is being filtered through thick pillows, not the kind made by an ex-crackhead, conspiracy theory, Christian nutjob, then passed through a low powered subwoofer.
Then the next, little noises that one may have never given much thought to, like opening a cabinet door, putting away silverware, washing your hair, flushing a toilet or the sweet sounds of coffee being percolating, sounds like you’re center stage at a Metallica concert with all amps pointed directly into your ears at volume 11!
The past few days I’ve been dreaming of this day. The doctor would come in and tell me everything went great and that I was his favorite patient, and my life is going to change dramatically for the better. Then he’d lean me back in his chair, tilt my head to the left and oh so gently unthread the bodily fluid soaked surgical packing from my ear, like a magician pulling an endless colorful scarf out of his sleeve, and then he’d reach the end with an enormous “POP!” And my ears would open up, and everything would sound loud and crisp and pure. Like a brand new baby hearing things outside the womb for the first time.
NOPE! It sounded pretty much the same as it did with that shit all crammed in there. It didn’t alleviate the fullness or pressure like I was hoping. It didn’t even change the hearing like I thought it would. That’s mainly because there is a bunch of dissolveable packing inside my head on the other side of my eardrum that could take anywhere from 2 to 8 weeks to disintegrate. What a bummer!
But it’s not all bad news, and as much as I’m complaining, I’m also trying to look on the bright. I’ve made it this far with minimal pain or complications. I haven’t lost my hearing. I haven’t had any infections or fevers. I didn’t have any profuse bleeding or gushing spinal fluids running out of my ear. I’ve missed minimal days of work. I finally get to sleep on my side again. I can get back to singing, and in two more weeks, all restrictions are lifted. I even got out of having to shovel the driveway. Sorry honey!
At this point, I don’t know what I think about the surgery because my hearing is still a mess, I’m still healing, and it will be a few more months before I have a better idea. Sometimes, it can take half a year to know the true results. I can say it seems my hearing in my right ear has improved, but now my left feels stuffy, but the doc said that’s common.
Now is the fun part of navigating learning how to deal with the unpredictable fluctuations in sound. We stopped by the mall after my appointment. It was my first time out of the house and in public since I left the hospital, and everything sounded so freaking LOUD! Turn down the God damn music! Stop walking so loudly! Stop talking! Stop making sounds! STOOOOPPPP!
And to think I wanted this surgery… I am still hopeful, though.
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